A Paradox of Prosperity and Unhappiness
The Hidden Fear & Anger Behind the Facade of Ordinary Americans
I worked with a Nazi for five years when I was stationed in Germany as an Army non-commissioned officer. Herr Meyer was a telecom engineer working for the US government in Bremerhaven, Germany. Throughout the five years we worked together, I went to his home and met his family, and he met mine. He invited me to various functions, parties, and beer festivals where I was the only American, the only non-Germain speaker, and the only African American in the place. We always had a good time, laughed, drank, and got shit-faced together, and there was never an awkward moment between us or his family and friends.
Some of my Germain co-workers tried to tell me that he was a Nazi. Not a former Nazi, he was still active. They showed me a grainy black-and-white photograph from the local Munich newspaper, where a bunch of old Nazis meet annually. The photograph was of a window in the hotel where the Nazi reunion was taking place. Herr Meyer was peering out the window.
After a bit of hesitation on my part, the time came for me to talk to him about his Nazi past. He told me his story. But I have to admit, it made no sense to me. He told me he was a Hitler youth. It was jarring to hear him say that. So, I tried to soften it by pointing out that many German children were forced to join The Hitler Youth. He proudly corrected me immediately and said that he enthusiastically volunteered to join the Hitler Youth. He said he hated Jews, and for some reason (I don’t have a lot of details), he and his family did not have a place to stay during the first years of the European war. This was before America joined the fray. Every place he and his family went to look for an apartment, the Jews who owned the buildings did not let them stay there (for reasons unknown to me), and Meyer and his family were destitute because of it. That’s the reason he gave me. That was it; not even religion was ever mentioned!
That bit of information changed my view of him and it changed our relationship. I never hung out with him after that. Our interactions became awkward, and we forced each other into mundane conversations and never talked about it again. I could not get past the fact that someone I respected so much was a Jew-hating Nazi. I eventually was transferred to another communications site, which was fine with me. I wondered what type of reaction he expected of me. As an African American, I would not feel comfortable with anyone who had such a racist outlook, and it made no difference whether it was my race or not. I always thought that if someone was anti-Semitic, they were also racist against African Americans. Even though he and his family treated me well, I could not understand his deep-rooted hate for another group. It seemed stupid as hell to me.
Now, I look at my neighbors, friends, co-workers, and former students and wonder why they support Republican leadership and the violence, vitriol, and hate they promote. These co-workers, neighbors, and acquaintances do not hate me as an individual (Well, some do hate me, but for different reasons), and I do not hate them (for being far right). But just as in my relationship with Herr Meyer, they hate much of what I stand for: freedom for women to make their own choices, a decent healthcare system for all, as well as access to higher education for all. I don’t understand their angry, prickly disposition. It is a Jeckel and Hyde situation. How can we interact as normal people in daily life processes yet be on opposite sides of the political and social spectrum? And what about tomorrow? What will this eventually lead to?
We are an unhappy country. By all measures, America is still one of the world’s most desirable countries. Sure, we complain, but none of us, the left, the right, black, white, rich, poor, are heading for the northern and southern borders in droves. There are a few of us wealthy enough to move to another country. Some are tethered to many responsibilities, i.e., kids, jobs, and mortgages, and can’t pack up and move. If you are not in entertainment (including sports) or independently wealthy, you most likely must stay in the best country in the world. What a punishment!
American politicians are petty, miserable, and vindictive also. They set the tone, and people get on board. We are engulfed in the media, which does less reporting about the country’s woes than leading us to our thoughts about the end of democracy and stroking our fears. Whether purposeful or not, the press plants and sows the seeds of mistrust and hate. We are united in our unhappiness. That is the only common ground we stand on. Some of the richest people in America, from entertainers, sports figures, politicians, or multi-billion-dollar business leaders, all spew anger, complaints, and threats of violence at each other. Even the billions they make and generate cannot give them happiness. They can never make enough money to move them out of unhappiness.
America is suffering from a lack of happiness, be it social, economic, or spiritual. We are now open to being led away by those who promise to make us happy. They are perpetrating false suffering and superimposing that suffering on Americans to tap into their subconscious. Indian philosopher Jiddu Krishnamurti said that suffering makes us dull and callous. When suffering is not understood, we seek to escape it through social movements and political leaders. History tells us that those promises by leaders never come to fruition, and people are stuck in a perpetual cauldron of fear and hate. And eventually, it all boils over.
We hope for others to solve our problems. We want to destroy those who cause us problems, but people will still be unhappy even if that can be done. Americans are in conflict with themselves. Most people, whether far left or far right, are decent people. If you can magically peel them away from the parties or groups they are a member of, your disdain for them (at least some of them) would dissipate at least to a noticeable level. I’ve seen meek, mild-mannered grandmothers walk into school board meetings and morph into foul-mouthed, belligerent assholes.
I am not comparing my co-workers and neighbors to Nazis. But the comparison to my early experience is inevitable. Under the thinly veiled guise of civility, a deep, dark, and strong current of unhappiness and fear is tearing apart the worn threads that are tenuously holding our society together. I do not believe the future holds doom and gloom for America. I do not think our democracy will die. Our institutions of rules and law, however weak and corrupted, will hold the line until we can take our heads out of our asses. However, as I write this, I know with the upcoming elections, things will get much worse before they get better. I believe there will be violence and death coming our way before, during, and after the election. I would love to look back on this time months from now and say I was wrong. I want someone to make fun of me and accuse me of leftist hyperbole. But to be pragmatic, we should all prepare for a shit show of an election right around the corner.
